Please don't judge/hate...

A blog I have been dreading writing for a few days....

Before I get in to the details of things I am going to ask that people please be understanding and not judge me for this...

I had to stop the vegan diet, I was 20 days in, so half way through my initial 40 day goal. If you've been reading this you know I have been sick for about 12 days now. Today is the first day I haven't had to take anything and I'm still not feeling great, but at least not bad enough that I feel I need to take something for it. On top of the awful cold I haven't been able to get over I have had some other health issues come up and needless to say I have been not feeling well at all because of it.

After googling some stuff and scaring the crap out of myself on Friday I decided that I need to stop the vegan thing for a while and work on getting myself healthy. I've hardly eaten anything in a week and most of what I have been eating I have had to force myself to eat. The last few days have been mostly crackers and yogurt with grape nuts mixed in. So I'm trying to stay as vegetarian as possible, with small amounts of meat mixed in just to get some protein in my system.

Please understand it isn't that I don't have a strong love for animals or that I don't care what I am putting in my body or where it is coming from because that isn't the case at all. Heck, I cry when I go to super pet adoptions or see on the news how many animals didn't get adopted at one. My heart sinks when I see a dead animal on the side of the road, and I barely made it through Food, Inc when I watched it. This is completely a health concern at this point....

I can try it again in the future, and if/when I do I need to plan things out a bit better. Going vegetarian is an easy thing to do, and I knew that when I started this which is why I wanted to try the vegan thing instead... Turns out it was much harder then I thought it would be. I did try a lot of new things and a few of them I plan on keeping in my diet. I spent a lot of time not knowing what to eat or how to make things... I am still open for suggestions and going to make a point to keep eating healthier, still going to keep as much junk food out of my diet as possible.

So again... please don't be mad and just hope that I get better fast so I can try this again.... I will keep trying to turn my old recipes into vegan versions and update and post them on this blog...


With all of that being said, I'm still open to ideas of vegan food to try or make...

Pies & Tarts....(now with pictures!)

I made some blueberry tarts and a peach-raspberry pie tonight! Not what I should have been doing on my day I spent home from work, but I have a depressed friend and he needed treats! Plus my roommate has been asking me to bake a pie for a while, so I figured it was time. My battery on my phone died so I will have to post pictures later, but yay for yummy treats!! I am going to go leave them at his apartment while he is at work tomorrow night so he will find them when he gets home. :)

I haven't eaten much food today... all the meds and being sick is just making me not want to eat. I've had some toast and a few crackers today but that is about it... Hopefully I start eating somewhat normal again... I think my body is lacking some major vitamins! I honestly think that is why I got sick in the first place, lack of vitamins my body needs to stay healthy and a horrible sleep schedule... I don't know... I'm in ramble mood today, I'm kind of in la la land. I think the night time pills just kicked in... Better be going.... Goodnight!



In all the years I have been making pies I have never attempted doing a lattice top before. So this was my first, very poor attempt at one.




Blueberry tarts and one peach-raspberry one. I had so much fun making these!

cheese

So Wednesday will be day 7 of being sick and finding myself being tempted to eat food that I know I shouldn't be eating. I've been good and am holding to this vegan diet, but I'm still tempted when I open the fridge and see so many things that I used to munch on. I miss cheese! I'm glad that I haven't been eating it, I know I shouldn't but its soo yummy! Its the one thing I really haven't found a replacement for that I like.

My roommate has so much 'junk' food in the house and being sick and not wanting to cook, I keep thinking how much easier it would be to just eat that instead, and then I realize how much healthier I have been eating because of the diet change.... She complains all the time that its to expensive to eat healthy but I don't feel like I've spent any more money on food then I used to buying the stuff I have been. Would like to see her try, but I guess that in the end it is her decision and not mine.

Jordan has been keeping me posted on the Pie getting vegan cheese in again... I am anxiously waiting that, I LOVE pizza of any kind and am sooo curious to try vegan pizza and see how it is!

I'm pretty sure I had more to say and better words to use to say what I already have, but I think the night time medicine has finally kicked in, so off to bed I go...

2 weeks!!

So I am officially two weeks in to this vegan thing, it got a lot easier after the first week. I made some awesome salsa, learned that I LOVE fresh pineapple and vegan pancakes are pretty darn good. :)

I've still been super sick so I didn't want anything that would take to much effort for dinner tonight, and have been craving waffles for some odd reason, so I decided to make pancakes. I just found a recipe I used to use when I was younger and used the egg substitute Jordan told me about, and used coconut milk.... They turned out pretty good. :) I had no idea coconut milk was so thick! I ended up having to put a bit of soy milk in them so the batter was a little thinner.





I still have way to many potatoes I need to use up. Someone suggested a stew, but it makes a ton and I know I wouldn't eat it all before it went bad. I really don't know what else to do with them... I will figure that out eventually.

I also need to work on expanding my diet still... There is a world of vegan food out there that I know I haven't even made it past the surface yet... I really just don't know what to cook though.


Back to lounging and resting... Work again tomorrow night, I need to get better before then!!

Salsa!!!

So from Green Bee I got a produce box and a salsa box! I made the salsa tonight, super yummy but super spicy, and I imagine it will be hotter tomorrow. It made a lot of salsa too, I need to go buy some chips. :)


The produce box had lettuce, tomatoes, potatoes, celery, zucchini, avocado, plums, apples, bananas and a mini cantaloupe in it. A few things I already had, so I've got TONS of potatoes I am trying to figure out how I am going to use before they go bad. My roommate and I both used them in our dinners tonight though... If anyone has suggestions on how to use them other then the common baking or mashed that would be helpful.

I didn't make the stir fry tonight because of the potato issue, I figure I should knock some of those out of the way first. I had a tiny bit of left overs still from my fajita's the other day so I put those in a pan with a sliced up potato, a tiny bit of olive oil and at the end a scoop of salsa I just made. Put it all in a tortilla with some 'cheese.' Turned out pretty good. :) Here's a salsa picture!

I just realized that I'm two weeks in to this vegan thing as of today!!

Green Bee!

I got my green bee box today! yay!


Produce box...


I got a salsa box too!

I heart smoothies! (updated)

Smoothies are amazing!! I'm glad I finally got around to making one! They need to become a regular thing!


Still not feeling great... I feel fine as long as I'm not talking or moving, but as soon as I get up to do something or start talking with my roommate I feel like crap again... Oh what fun! Glad I am off most of tomorrow too, I just have a work meeting at 1am that I am really not looking forward to knowing I have to work a double on Sunday.... Calling out of sick was needed today though, I don't think I would have been okay to go in to work today. Weird feeling to in sick to work, it isn't something I have done in over three years!!

If I'm feeling up to it, I plan on making either some form of stir fry or maybe fried rice... We'll see...............


*updated*

I'm getting my produce box tomorrow!! I'm so excited! Should make for some interesting meals the next week or so! My roommate is picking it up in the morning on her way to work, so I won't see the box until later in the afternoon, but am sure it will be wonderful. :)

Its 12:30a and I just finally started feeling a bit better about an hour ago. I had been talking to my mom and she mentioned that maybe I should take some IBprofen to help with the swollen gland, so I took that and some tylenol as well. Its amazing how much it helped! Hoping I'm still feeling alright when I wake up tomorrow. Work meeting tomorrow at 1am, I'm DREADING it... Who schedules a meeting that late at night??? I don't think I will be home until after 2am.... Then work Sunday morning, should be an interesting few days....

Got some food ideas for tomorrow nights dinner. My mom gave me some stir fry tips... Not sure how it will turn out, but super excited to try it.

I think as much as I've had a hard time with the food I've been trying to cook, I have at least had a great time experiencing all these new things. It has forced me out of my little bubble of things I ate on a regular basis, and dinners I enjoyed making. I'm finding new things I seem to love and learning how to adapt some of the old recipes... Don't get me wrong, I've cooked plenty of bad things the last couple weeks, but it is all part of the learning experience.

Okay, I'm sick and I should be in bed, not up typing, so Off I go!

Sick :(

Today was not a good day for sticking with my new rules! I stayed up sooo late last night and was in bed until around 330p today. I just had zero energy today, even when I did get up and start moving around... I was just tired! Turns out I'm getting sick... bleh. I could kind of feel it last night, but now after going to work and talking all night, my throat hurts my head is stuffy and I have a swollen gland in my neck. Its 2am and I should be sleeping instead of doing this, but it is so hard for me to wind down after work.

I took lots of vitamins and drank some orange juice and I think I'm going to finally get around to making a fruit smoothie tomorrow... I hope it all helps. I really can't afford to get sick right now!

No exciting food eaten today... Just leftover mashed potatoes and some egg veggie egg rolls.

I really want to learn to make stir fry, I have a ton of stuff to go in it... Anyone know how to go about it or sauces or anything?? It seems like it would be pretty common sense, but I don't know. I will make it my plan for Saturday since I am off most of the day... Tomorrow I think I'm just going to eat fruit and veggies all day... Nothing processed... Hoping it will help me get better.

St. Patrick's Day!

I'm not sure if I will ever quite catch on to vegan cooking/baking. I made some cupcakes for St.Patrick's day. They were pretty yummy, but they seem soooo much different then regular ones and the only difference is that I had to use something other then eggs in them. Strange...

Here is a picture of some of the messier ones I made, I forgot to take pictures of the pretty ones before I took them to work.



I also made green potato chip cookies, green mashed potatoes, and an artichoke for dinner yesterday. The only thing I had all day that wasn't green was water. :)




potatoes...



Other then the cupcakes being a bit off I've had a good week so far with food. :)

Dinner!

The fajita's I made tonight for dinner! They had a spicy lime sauce, sooo yummy! Good to be enjoying my food again!




I even put "cheese" on them!

Day 9...

Today has been very productive!! I'm LOVING the weather and being able to spend time outside! I got all my St.Patrick's day shopping done today and can't wait for all the green food on Wednesday!

I bought a pineapple for the first time today!! I'm a bit scared to cut it, I'm good at hurting myself... I also bought a few artichokes to make for dinner on Wednesday. I stocked up on lots of veggies and am genuinely excited for food this week! I have decided that I need to learn to make stir fry, it doesn't seem like it should be to hard... We shall see!!

I did give in a little today to non-vegan food. I made a decision to add milk back into my diet. Only to drink though, I still plan on checking labels and making sure I am not buying food with milk in it and I don't plan on cooking with it. Doing all of this cold turkey was a bit harder then I had anticipated... I don't plan on 'cheating' any more though.

I had a dream the other night that I accidentally ate some chicken and it kind of freaked me out! I was panicked even a little when I woke up because I wasn't sure if I had or not... Weird..... Maybe this no meat thing is good.. :)

So much to do still today!

Day 8...suggestions welcome....

Feeling a little better again today so yay for that!! I stated taking some of my vitamins again, I think they are going to help.

I'm off work tomorrow so my plan is to do some St.Patrick's day baking! I'm going to make green potato chip cookies, which I have made vegan before but never tried to dye them a color... I'm excited for those. I'm also going to attempt making vegan cupcakes... lemon-lime ones with lemon frosting and fun St.Patrick's day sprinkles! Those might wait until Tuesday before work, we'll see how much time I have.

I am finally going to make fajita's tomorrow as well... Should be a productive day. I need to go shopping again.... I have no idea what to make.................... Help!

Day 7...

I started my day by getting up and heading to the St.Patrick's day parade with my roommate and some friends. Lots of rain but so much fun! I've never been to a St.Patty's day parade before. :) So yay for getting up at a decent time today!

As far as food goes.... I made some guacamole and was planning on making fajita's but they don't sound very good right now, so I will make them another day. The guacamole was pretty good though... I can taste that it is different then what I usually make but its one of the only things I've made this week that I've actually enjoyed.

My first couple days of this I had a hard time, my stomach was gross and I just didn't feel good, then I had a few days of feeling better and now I'm back to feeling gross again. I don't know what it is, but if this keeps up I don't know if I can keep doing this... Maybe I should have gradually cut things out instead of just doing it all at one time? I don't know, but this isn't fun. I am going to see how I feel at the same time next week.... Either way... I plan on sticking with my rules that I posted last night.

revamp...

So it has been decided that I need to start eating better, and by better I mean I've hardly eaten anything all week and most of it has been some form of grain... Not good! Jordan has been encouraging to make smoothies, so tomorrow for lunch that is the plan! I have a ton of frozen fruit and lots of juice and stuff I can use!

My roommate told me tonight if I don't start eating she is going to make me stop this 40 day trial... So in an effort to make sure this works I am going to try and make a better effort to make sure I am eating, and not just anything, but eating well. I went grocery shopping again tonight and bought stuff to make some spicy fajita's and some guacamole, so that should good for dinner tomorrow and lunch for a few days.

I was talking to a long time customer the other day at work and it got me thinking about what I am doing with this 40 day vegan thing.

My work schedule has made it so my sleeping and eating schedules are a mess. On the nights that I close I don't get home until anywhere from 12:30am and 2:00a depending on the night. I'm also not allowed to clock out for a break or leave the store while I am working because I am a manager and I can't leave the CSR's in the store by themselves. Makes it hard to get to bed at a decent hour and hard to make sure I'm eating when I should be if I forget to bring something with me.

So in an effort to do this thing right I am going to try and do a total revamp of things... I need to fix my sleep schedule... Staying up hours past when I feel tired doing nothing productive is pointless and unhealthy... So

rule #1, if I'm tired I need to go to bed.
Rule #2, no sleeping until the middle of the afternoon unless I'm genuinely sick. I stay up all night and sleep all day and get absolutely nothing done during the day.
Rule #3, no more wasting so much time doing mind numbing things like staring at the TV watching movies or spending countless hours on my computer not doing anything to better myself. Just because I get free movie rentals at work doesn't mean I need to spend all of my time watching movies, which brings me to...
Rule #4, I need to read more! I own so many books that I have never read, and a bunch more that I have and love and wouldn't mind reading again.
Rule #5, I need to make a point to plan out my meals at least a little bit... Maybe make some kind of schedule? I'm not quite sure yet how to fix my eating habits... Suggestions are welcome...

Tomorrow I am getting up bright and early to get ready for the St.Patrick's day parade. I work 5p-1:30a so its going to be a long day... Happy thoughts everything goes well!

Day 6... discourging...

So this no meat thing isn't a problem at all, but the no dairy is proving to be much harder then I thought it would be.... Being Italian and not being able to cook with dairy is not an easy thing to do. I decided tonight to try making vegan alfredo... It did not go over well. It smells just as good as the alfredo I usually make does, but the taste is just bleh.... I don't know how to fix it and the ingredients aren't much different then what I would normally use... Just the vegan versions of them. I will try it again another day. As for dinner tonight... My roommate is making fajita's so I asked her to cook some veggies separate for me so I can have some.

I have spent my entire life cooking and baking. I grew up in a house where everything was made from scratch, we never ate anything from a box... Heck my mom was a professional pastry chef. My moms family is from North Dakota so from them I learned to cook all these hearty meals.... the kinds that keep you full all day long because they grew up on farms and the men needed hearty lunches to keep them going for the day. From my dads family I learned how to cook italian food... Everything has meat or cheese or cream of some sort in it... Cutting the meat is easy, always has been. Not being able to even sprinkle parmesan cheese on something is pretty hard. I'm sure it will get easier... I'm only 6 days in...


Here's a not very good picture of the sauce I made... Its a bit pink because I add tomato's to it.

Day 4... not to exciting.

Nothing exciting to type today.... I had big thoughts going through my head today after a conversation I had with a regular at my store, and well... I just don't have the energy to get it all out right now, so I will save it for another time.

Today I remembered that I love tortilla's even if they don't have anything on them, I grabbed one on my way out the door this morning and have snacked on a couple tonight, I had a leftover stuffed pepper from yesterday when I got home and a lettuce and tomato sandwich tonight. Went and saw a movie with my roommate... Really, nothing exciting today... I will try and post something more exciting tomorrow.

Day 3...

So last night after I posted I had some crackers with the vegan cream cheese... not so sure how the cream cheese was, I couldn't really taste it with the crackers I bought... The crackers were pretty nasty though, but thats not a vegan thing it was just some gross flavored crackers. I was still needing to find something to eat though since I hadn't eaten dinner yet. I decided to make a BLT, minus the 'B' of course! ;) I used the veganaise on it and it was so good! I was really surprised. I figured since I was on a roll of trying new things I would try the vegan cheddar cheese that I bought for the peppers I made... I made the mistake of smelling it first and had a little tiny sliver of it... Soo not something I want to try again... I have a habit of smelling everything I eat or drink before I try it and well, maybe it would be better if I didn't smell it first...


So I made some stuffed peppers today, I think they turned out pretty good! I made one with just spanish rice in it and real cheese on top for my roommate, because well... she is a bit scared of all this stuff, and honestly I don't blame her. I chopped up some mushrooms and onions and and sauteed them in some olive oil with some salt and pepper and mixed that with the rice for two of them and then for the third one I added some boca burger stuff to it. I even tried some of the vegan sour cream with it on the side... not to bad. I decided that maybe I should give that cheese another try so I put some on top of a couple of them but haven't tried it yet.

Maybe it is because I know it isn't cheese, or the fact that its rubbery feeling or that it didn't really melt in the oven even though it said it would... I'm not sure, but I guess this whole thing is about trying new things so I really do need to give it another chance.

Oh! So one of my coworkers has been vegan for a really long time and has been helpful in letting me know about where to find things and what ingredients to look for that I wouldn't normally care was in something so that I know I shouldn't have it... Anyway he gave me this website http://www.greenbeeproduce.com . Its pretty cool, you order a box of fresh produce on Monday and on Saturday morning you go pick it up. There are a bunch of different pick up points, you can just choose the one closest to you. My roommate and I decided to give it a try and ordered 2 different boxes last night, one with just a bunch of fruits and vegetables in it and one is a salsa box to make your own salsa. I'm excited to go pick it up on Saturday! Being as picky as I am with fruits and veggies I'm not so sure how it will work out but I figure if I don't eat it my roommate probably will.

That is all for today...

Here is a picture of the peppers I made.

Vegan Day 2...

Today I went shopping for some vegan food.... Things I never thought I would try, but here I am..... Try something new every day, right?

I bought vegan mayo that actually smells better then real mayo... I'm excited to try it on a sandwich! I also bought two kinds of vegan cheese! I find it hilarious that a selling point on the package is that it melts! I should take a picture! I bought some soy milk... something that I get in Jamba Juice when I go there but one of those things I have never tried on its own even though I grew up with it in my house... What else... vegan friendly cream cheese and vegan friendly sour cream...

I was going to make stuffed peppers tonight but its already 10:30pm so I'm not sure yet if I will still. I'm not to concerned about them turning out okay because they aren't much different then how I would normally make them... Its the cheese to go on top that I am curious to try!

I also bought some stuff to make vegan alfredo... To be honest, I am a little afraid of how it will turn out, but I looked up some stuff online earlier and well I'm hoping it will work out.

Okay... That is all for tonight!

Vegan Day 1...

I didn't really plan this vegan diet well... I have just some basics to hold me over until I get paid on Friday and will have more money to spend at the store on food. I had a boca burger today for lunch and a Jamba Juice while I was at work and a PB&J sandwich when I came home from work tonight.

Nothing terribly exciting and all things I would normally eat...In all honesty I probably will be eating a lot of similar things for the rest of the week, but plan on finding some recipes this week and start making some more substantial meals.

I think that this is going to also help with my extra spending at work.... Its easy to just grab some candy and snack on it if I forgot to bring dinner to work. I know that eating most candy is still an option but I am choosing to cut it all out while I am doing this.... Lets see how it goes!

Vegan

For Lent this year I decided I would go Vegan for 40 days... I didn't start it on the 17th of February like I was supposed to though. I started Sunday March 7th, my last day will be Sunday April 18th. I've decided I would start a separate blog just to track things and see how it goes.... I posted a blog yesterday on my other one so today will be a lot of posts just to have everything in one place....